Day 1: Thursday October 16th
I went to work, feeling fine, then went to Buffalo Wild Wings to have lunch with a friend. When we were nearly done with our meals, I felt like I peed my pants a bit. I abruptly told her I needed to use the restroom. Once there, I wasn't too sure if my water broke, or if I had peed... but it just didn't feel like pee. So I went back, told my friend I needed to leave, that possibly my water broke, but that I needed to go. I walked to work to get my car keys, sent out a quick email saying I was leaving for the day because I wasn't feeling well (and luckily didn't see anyone when I was in the office), and walked to my car. On the way to my car (which was the longest walk ever, because I was worried my water would fully break and I'd look like I was peeing my pants), I called Joel and said something along the lines of, "So I don't want you to freak out, but it's possible my water broke. What do I do? Should I meet you at home and we can go to the hospital together? Should I try to call the doctor? What do I do? I'm not sure if it was my water though, because it wasn't a lot, but I don't think it was pee." So we decided to meet at home, since I was feeling fine and from our experience with Bennett, we knew that even if it WAS my water breaking, we didn't need to rush to the hospital. On the drive home, I called my mom and basically told her the same thing, just in case it was my water breaking, so that she'd know she'd have to take Bennett. We got home, gathered our things, tried to call my OB office, but got the voicemail for the triage nurse. Then we called the hospital, who told us to call the OB office, and when we told them we weren't able to speak with a nurse and didn't want to wait for a call back, they told us to come in and that my doctor was actually at the hospital, so they'd talk to her for me. That was kind of handy!
Like with Bennett, we walked into the hospital smiling and laughing. Gave the security guard at the information desk a nice wave, "Labor and Delivery is on the second floor, right?" and he pointed us in the right direction. I'm sure he sees hundred of pregnant women walking into the hospital on their way to have a baby. I like to think (hope) that they're all in worse shape than I'm in when they arrive, and that our happy, relaxed demeanor throws them off... but I'm sure many couples walk in the way we do. In the triage room, they did the test and confirmed that it was my water breaking. I had been hoping it was just pee... but also hoping it wasn't just pee, because it's kind of embarrassing to show up at the hospital thinking your water broke, but only finding out it was just pee... luckily for me, no embarrassing 'just pee' situation. It was the real deal. Also unluckily for me, it was 2.5 weeks ahead of schedule. I didn't want an October baby!
By the time I was admitted to the hospital, it was a little after 2:30 pm. We were assigned an awesome nurse, named Angie. She was really laid back, had a great sense of humor, and one of those women I could see myself hanging out with, had we met under different circumstances. I had to be hooked up to monitors for a while to make sure the baby and I were okay, and given penicillan because the results from my strep test (which I had done the day before at my appointment) weren't back yet. This time around, they gave me the option of whether or not I wanted to start Pitocin to get things going. With Bennett, I didn't get a choice, so I really wasn't sure what to do. Do I start it up and get her delivered? Or do I walk a bit and see if my body kicks in on it's own. I decided to give it some time and around 3:45 pm, I started doing laps around the Labor and Delivery wing. I wasn't feeling any contractions, although they were 2-3 minutes apart, so as Angie the nurse and I decided, I should do laps to lose some weight before the newborn pictures I'd have to take. During this time, Joel went to get Bennett and do the hand off to Grandma, so I was left to my lonesome to walk around the nurses' station. Occasionally Angie the nurse would tell me to run and do burpies, and we'd all laugh. I got to walk past quite a few nervous looking dads, who gave me the side eye, probably wondering why I was walking around, looking pretty normal.
 |
| The magic cup |
 |
| Posing with the puppy pee pad |
This time around, I was sooo super nervous about starting Pitocin. I knew what was in store for me: lots of pain. But how much? How soon? That I didn't know. And how much did it REALLY hurt last time? I couldn't remember. What if it was way worse than I remember? What if it goes much more slowly than last time? What if it is both more slowly and more painful that I cave and get an epidural? I really didn't want to get one! So now I was super nervous knowing we were at the beginning of the end. With my nerves getting the better of me, I asked Angie how big the baby would be, since she was so early (I was only at 36 weeks and 1 day) and she told me maybe 5.5 to 6 pounds. Would she be okay? It's just so early. Angie the nurse said she felt things would be okay, that all the scary things that could be underdeveloped (like the lungs) were behind her.
Almost instantly, I started to feel contractions. They weren't super horrible but definitely caused some pain. After the first half hour, Angie the nurse came to check on me, and I told her I was feeling the contractions, so she let me be. After another half hour, she checked on me again. I was still feeling pain and was only at 3-4 cms. AN HOUR TO GET TO 3-4 CMS?? HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE? I mean, I was feeling enough pain where I was sure I was at least at 5 cms, so she stepped up the Pitocin. She told me that they typically up the dosage every half hour, but since I went from feeling zero contractions to feeling some contractions in the first half hour, she didn't up the dosage. However she gave me a choice this time: crank up the Pitocin or keep on with how things were going. Well, I was going to feel pain either way, so let's step it up and get it over with faster. She enjoyed that attitude.
By 10:45, I was in quite a bit of pain. Angie the nurse checked me, said I was at 5 cms and that she was going to call my doctor. Apparently my doctor had been calling all night to check on me, and was pretty shocked to hear my water had broken after seeing me the day before, and told Angie the nurse that she wanted to be notified when I was around 6 cms so that she could come in. But, as I told Angie the nurse, I was only 5 cms! I don't want the doctor to wait around for me to get to 10 cms. It had taken me hours to get to 5 cms! But Angie the nurse told me my doctor felt I'd go quickly and wanted to be sure she was at the hospital for the delivery. (I have to say, hearing that Dr. Johnson kept calling to check on me and wanting to be sure she was a the hospital for the delivery made me really happy. Angie the nurse told me that Dr. Johnson insists on being there for all of her patient's deliveries unless she was in surgery or on vacation- with Bennett she was in surgery. I already thought she was a fantastic doctor, but this just made me extra happy she was MY doctor.) By 11 pm she was at the hospital. I told her I was sorry she came in, that I didn't want her to wait around forever, but she told me it wasn't a big deal, that she wanted to be sure she was here for the delivery, and that it'd give her time to check up on email. She told me to let her know if I felt any pressure. I asked how I'd know if I felt pressure, and she said with a smile, "Oh, you'll know." Angie the nurse came in to say her good-byes, as her shift was over. Dr. Johnson told me she wanted to stay, but since she had already worked a double, they told her to go. I remember her telling Dr. Johnson that I was in more pain than she had seen me all night, and that my breathing had changed... whatever that means.
With Angie the nurse gone, the new nurse asked how I was doing and if I wanted any pain meds. I told her I thought it was too late for pain meds, but she assured me it was never too late, that it was up to me, but that she knew I wanted to do it without. I was in so much pain, but it was at that moment I decided no, definitely no pain meds, we were going to do it without!! At 11:15 pm (longest 15 minutes of my life) I thought I felt something that was maybe the pressure Dr. Johnson had mentioned, so I told Joel to get the nurse. The nurse came in and checked me, but I was only at 7 cms. "Oh. Ok. Weird. I thought I felt something..." but she assured me I was only at 7 cms. Not even a few minutes later, the sensation to push hit me like a freight train. "YES. IT IS TIME. I NEED TO PUSH NOW," I told her very firmly. So I started pushing, and she ran out to get Dr. Johnson and the rest of the crew. "Call Neonatal," I remember someone saying, which made me nervous. I did two big pushes laying on my side, and they told me after the urge was over, I needed to flip onto my back. "OMG, flip onto my back, how am I going to do that?" I remember thinking to myself, but somehow I did. One big push and the head was out. Another big, super long push, she was out.
Dr. Johnson asked if we knew the sex, and I said, "If you tell me it isn't a girl, I'm going to be really disappointed" but it was a girl, she announced. Then they set her on me. I remember thinking she was much bigger than I expected her to be... and slimier and gooier... I hadn't passed the afterbirth yet, so the most disturbing thing was feeling the umbilical cord running down my body, knowing it was still connected... so gross. But despite that, it was such a nice moment. I remember after she was put on me, everyone kind of sat back and just let me have my time with her. There wasn't a rush to get her cleaned off, weigh her, cut the cord, nothing. It seemed like time stopped and everyone wanted to enjoy this moment. It actually felt really wonderful.
From this point on, it was all kind of a nice, serene blur. I got to cuddle with her skin to skin for quite some time. I asked the nurse if she needed to be weighed and measures but the nurse told me I could take as long as I wanted and no one was in a rush to take her. It was such a nice change from how things were with Bennett, where we only got to cuddle for a few minutes before he was measured, cleaned and then given back to me wrapped in a blanket. At one point, she started fussing as she was laying on me. I stroked her head and cooed at her, and she settled down and went to sleep. It was a really wonderful mom moment.
Since Caroline came out so quickly, her face got completely bruised on the way out. No one told us that however, and with her coloring, her face looked really brown/gray. When we were alone, Joel asked me who her real father is, because she looked incredibly African American. I replied, "I don't think I'm her real mom..." and it was soon after that, that the nurse came back and commented on how bruised her face was. Well, that would've been nice to know to begin with! (When we were eventually moved to our room, the nurse there told us that usually she tells parents to make sure the baby is breathing, and if there was ever a question if the baby was breathing or if the baby's face was turning blue, to call for a nurse immediately. Well, considering Caroline's face was already blue, obviously we wouldn't be able to tell if she wasn't getting enough oxygen. She decided to put a pulse/ox monitor on her, so that we'd know for sure if she was okay. Then she added a little note onto her bassinet, so that others would know why her face was blue. She said that a bruised face was fairly common, but this was the worst she had ever seen. Great!)
Eventually they took her to be measured. 6 pounds, 11.5 ounces. 20 inches long. Head was 13 cms. Her head was full of hair, which was a surprise to us! With Bennett, I had bad heartburn through pregnancy and there's an old wives tale that says if there is heartburn with pregnancy, the baby will have a lot of hair. With Caroline, I didn't have any heartburn, so I figured she'd come out bald, just like I did as a baby. Luckily for her, and for us, she was blessed with more hair than we know what to do with. She also has the same colored eyes as her big brother, the dark blue/gray. I know they'll change to brown, like Bennett's did, but it's nice to see that she's following in her brother's footsteps. Our first reaction after seeing her (aside from wondering who her real parents are) was that she looks just like Bennett. Both Joel and I said that. JUST LIKE HIM. When Bennett was born, he just looked like a baby to us. Nothing particularly notable, didn't look like either one of us. Caroline though, looks just like Bennett. There's no denying they're siblings! And it's good news for her, since Bennett is a cute kid!
I was given a really crappy boxed meal, since the kitchen was closed. It was so disappointing. My first meal after Bennett was born was THE BEST. I ordered a ton of food, two desserts, and this time, it was the world's crappiest box lunch, PLUS, she was born before midnight, so no extra nights stay in the hospital for us. Then, when we were finally moved to our room on the 4th floor, they have a button they push, to play music when a baby leaves the labor and delivery wing, so that the hospital knows a new baby was born... only when your baby is born around midnight, they don't play the music because it's too late. So no special music either! It was quite disappointing!
When all was said and done, I have to say, this wasn't the dream delivery I was hoping for. I was hoping it'd be like with Bennett, my water breaking in the middle of a November night. I push the baby out without Pitocin, and it's less painful than I remember. But nope. October baby. Water breaking IN PUBLIC, while I was on lunch from work. Delivery just before midnight, so that there wasn't an extra night stay in the hospital (although Dr. Johnson told us if we had delivered at like 11:56 pm, she would've fudged it and said it happened after midnight... but she couldn't fudge 26 minutes.) BUT, despite being a preemie being born at 36 weeks and 1 day (37 weeks is full term), we have a healthy baby girl, which is all that matters.
Day 2: Friday October 17
We didn't get much sleep in Caroline's first few hours of life and got up early because Grandma was bringing big brother Bennett to visit. Bennett instantly noticed the bassinet with the baby in it, and said, "Baby?" He was incredibly sweet with her, wanting to hold her and being incredibly gentle. Our room was a corner room with windows on two walls, so Bennett had a great time looking at the traffic on Highway 62.
 |
| Holding his sister for the first time |
 |
| Telling me to put her back in the bassinet |
After a few hours, Joel took Bennett to daycare, then went home to do some of the chores we were supposed to have done before the baby arrived... like setup the nursery. Caroline and I had plenty of bonding time, and I got plenty bored with no one to talk to. Dr. Johnson came to visit and said I did incredible with the delivery and I was the perfect person to go without pain meds during delivery because I was so in control. Ha. I don't think one can ever be 'in control' during labor, but alas, another nice compliment. The nurse also brought me a pump, so that I could start pumping after the nursing and finger feeding. Eventually Grandma left work early and came to hold the baby.
 |
| The hat the labor and delivery nurses made Caroline |
Then Joel came and the three of us watched Caroline get her first bath. (Unlike Bennett, they didn't wash Caroline off right away. I think it was because she is a preemie and they don't wash preemies immediately, because they have issues regulating their body heat.)
Then Joel left to pick up Bennett and bring him to the hospital. Uncle Kevin ended up visiting as well, bringing dinner with. After some eating and visiting, everyone left and Joel and I were able to go to bed around 9 pm.
When Caroline was about 24 hours old, the nurse came to take her weight and do a jaundice test on her. Prior to this she was having her heel pricked before every meal, to check her blood sugar. Her weight had dropped a bit and her jaundice levels were high, so the nurse decided we needed to start supplementing her with formula until my milk came in. The high jaundice levels also meant they needed to draw blood for a more accurate jaundice test. Poor kid. Between all the nurse's visits, lab coming to draw blood, nursing and then finger feeding formula, I didn't get much sleep that night.
Day 3: Saturday October 18
We were discharged on Saturday but didn't feel rushed to leave. Our plan was to take our time and leave after lunch. Our morning was filled with a visit from the on-call OB for me, the on-call pediatrician for Caroline, and the lab to draw more blood from Caroline to check her Jaundice levels again- because of the bruising on her face, they knew she'd register higher for Jaundice anyways. Grandma, Grandpa and Bennett came to the hospital around 10 am. After a visit and some photos, Grandma and Grandpa left, so that we could finish getting discharged and leave as a family of four. The day nurse discharging us was great and spent a lot of time just hanging out and chatting with us. We were telling her we were hoping Caroline would be born after midnight so that we could stay an extra night, and she said we could stay as late as we wanted, even until 11:59 pm if we wanted. She said if we did, then she could hang out with us all day because we were fun. Apparently we are the best patients ever.
 |
| Finger Feeding |
Our morning began with a visit from a nurse. We really love that Fairview has this home-visit program (which we utilized with Bennett too). She gave Caroline another prick in her heel, to draw more blood to test the Jaundice. Her poor heels were so full of little scars at this point, I don't know where she found room to poke her.
Shortly after the nurse left, we packed up the biliblanket, breast pump, eye dropper and container for finger feedings, diaper bag, dogs, baby and Bennett to head to Grandma and Grandpa's house. Caroline got to meet her cousin August, Aunt Nicole and Uncle Tony. August wasn't a huge fan of Caroline, but we managed to get a nice picture of the ABC kids. We got a call later that afternoon telling us her Jaundice levels were much elevated and she needed to be in the biliblanket all the time, except during diaper changes, and that she had lost 10% of her birth weight so we needed to give her supplements via a bottle instead of finger feeding.
 |
| Sucking down her first bottle |
 |
| The look of satisfaction |
Day 5: Monday, October 20
After a total of four hours of sleep, our day began by Joel bringing Bennett to daycare. Then we took Caroline to the doctor. She was down to 6 pounds, 1 ounce and gave her another heel poke to test her bilirubin levels. (I think she's over a dozen heel pokes at this point.) Later on that day, the pediatrician called and told us her bilirubin level was at 14.9. He mentioned that the higher bilirubin levels were expected, because Jaundice works by getting elevated, then a slow decline, but was happy with how she was doing. He told us she only needed to be in the biliblanket 60-70% of the time now, instead of 24/7, but the longer she was in there, the better.
 |
| She decided to pose and take a nap |
Day 5: Tuesday, October 21
Living by Caroline's 3 hour cycle now. Every three hours, I spend 15 minutes trying to wake her. 20-30 minutes trying to nurse her. Diaper change. 20 minutes feeding her supplements, 20 minutes pumping, then washing all the equipment. With all of my extra time before the next feeding, I'd either nap, go online, or eat. Not too exciting.
 |
| Trying to cuddle with the biliblanket |
 |
| Big brother holding Caroline after daycare |
 |
| Showing us where her hair is |
Day 6: Wednesday, October 22
Back to the doctor to meet with another pediatrician, who is also a lactation consultant. She helped whip Caroline back into shape and we were back on track with the nursing! Caroline weighed 6 pounds, 2 ounces. Another heel poke and blood draw to check her biliruben levels. It was down to 13-something, so we got some good news: She was done with the biliblanket! Yay!
Day 7: Thursday, October 23
See day #5... much of the same
 |
| Taking a nap on the dining room table |
 |
| She can bust out of anything |
 |
| Bennett at 14 days and Caroline at 7 days. Twins! |
The day was much the same. We had another appointment at the pediatrician so that they could check Caroline's weight. She was up to 6 pounds, 5.9 ounces. She gained 3.9 ounces in two days! They said they like to see babies gain 0.5-1 ounce a day, so she was doing amazing! No more supplemental feedings needed anymore. This was great news! Finally, we could start a more normal routine that didn't include a biliblanket, bottles or pumping!
Day 9: Saturday, October 25
We went to the mall to find outfits for newborn pictures were taking the next day. Not a minute after we walked into the mall, Caroline let out a huge grin. I think we may have a shopaholic in our future! After the mall, Joel and Bennett went to have dinner at the restaurant, and Caroline and I kept up her routine. We went to bed early because we had a big day planned for Sunday.
Our morning started early with a photographer coming over to take Caroline's newborn photos. Bennett was amazing! So obedient, posing well for the camera, and in his usual happy mood. After 1.5 hours we were done, and Grandma and Grandpa Swenson were less than an hour away. Caroline was finally going to meet her other grandparents! Uncle Kyle and cousins Evelyn and Ellen were coming as well. Bennett was really excited to see his cousin. We all had lunch, and then Bennett skipped his nap to play. By the time everyone left, it was after 4 pm. We needed to leave for the other Grandma and Grandpa's house because it was Grandpa's 65th birthday. The day was clearly too much for Bennett, and he had the most epic meltdown ever. 20 minutes of inconsolable screaming and crying, which continued for another 15 minutes in the car. He eventually fell asleep but when we arrived at Grandma and Grandpa's house 20 minutes later and had to wake him up, he continued with the meltdown. It wasn't until Aunt Nicole sat with him that he stopped and was back to his normal self. By the time we got home on Sunday, it was after 9 pm. On the drive home, Caroline cried for a bit, which was pretty unusual for her. I think she was hungry but since we were on the road, there wasn't anything we could do about it. Once home, I tried to nurse her and she wanted nothing to do with nursing. She screamed, cried and pushed away. After an hour of trying, we went back to finger feeding, because she needed to eat.
Day 11: Monday, October 27
Caroline's nursing strike continued throughout the night and all day Monday. So incredibly frustrating. The beginning of every feeding, we'd spend 45 minutes trying to nurse, but mostly she'd just scream and struggle and I'd get anxious and upset. Monday was one of the roughest days ever. It's frustrating when your kid suddenly wants nothing to do with nursing, for no apparent reason, plus being hormonal doesn't help. She did take her first (short) nap in her crib though.
Day 12: Tuesday, October 28
Much the same. Nursing strike continues. Pumping and bottle feedings continue.
Day 13: Wednesday, October 29
Same as the day before.
 |
| Burping |
Day 14: Thursday, October 30
We had an appointment with the pediatrician/lactation consultant again today. Right before we left home, she was hungry and fussy. I decided to try to nurse, which usually makes her fall asleep, so that I could put her in the car seat and leave. Naturally, she latched on and started eating. Why? Who knows. After five minutes, I had to stop her, so that we could leave and not be incredibly late for the appointment. Then at the appointment, she latched on and ate like it was no big deal. I'm sure the pediatrician thought I was insane, but what could I say? Who knows why she suddenly decided to eat. The good news is, she was up to 7 pounds, 0.3 ounces. They said they like to see her back at her birth weight two weeks after she's born... and she's well past that. Good job, baby!
Afterwards, we had lunch with Grandpa and then hung out with Grandpa. We finished off our day by heading home and having Grandma, Grandpa and Uncle Kevin over for dinner. Hopefully we're back on track with the eating now.
Caroline seems to have a little bit of a cold. She sneezes a lot, but doesn't seem too stuffy. She pretty much insists on sleeping with us at night, so I'm sure we're forming good habits. It's hard not to cater to her wants, because she was born so early and is still supposed to be living life in the womb still. She should be all snuggled up and warm, floating around in fluids, not living in the real world. Considering that, it's hard to not give her the snuggling she wants and should have.
No comments:
Post a Comment